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Band 4.5CEFR B1290 words

Some people believe that companies should manufacturing products that last for a long time. Others feel that the emphasis should be place on producing goods that are cheap. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The essay addresses both views and provides a clear opinion, meeting the basic task requirements, but the development of ideas is limited and repetitive. Coherence is hindered b...

IELTS WritingCEFR B1Checked

Prompt

Some people believe that companies should manufacturing products that last for a long time. Others feel that the emphasis should be place on producing goods that are cheap. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Essay review

Annotated essay

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The manufactured items are in massive demand throughout the world. Some say that enterprises should produce products for long-lasting, whereas others consider that manufacturing companies should produce inexpensive goods. I strongly agree with the former opinion because long-duration goods will save money for not buying often.

On the one hand, production companies ought to be produced a long period of things which is a better quality of products so that people have to save their money from buying frequently. The quality is determined the duration of the products. For example, the Apple smartphone is the long-lasting product by a better standard of quality, and as a result, this company have a massive amount of happiest customers. To be more precise, when a company will start to produce long-duration goods while the environment also will protect from pollution which toxic chemicals mixed into the air.

Therefore, enterprises ought to produce the goods which has long-lasting.

On the other hand, companies should produce the cheap goods so sales would increase as well as demand also will be increased so that monopoly situation have to be removed in the world market. Because competitior's companies try to sales goods with a low cost, people's buying ratio increases. For instance, smartphones price is inexpensive in the world market, many top companies also sales with a low amount so that they will increase the demand by reducing the price. Hence, production enterprises should produce cheap goods.

To conclude, Although manufacturing companies ought to produce goods with long-lasting in order to people do not buy goods often, demand and sales will be increased when manufacturing companies reduce their good's prices. In my opinion, about this, I strongly agree that production enterprises should produce things with long warranty.

Error patterns

Band & CEFR

Band 4.5

CEFR B1 · High

Assessment summary

The essay addresses both views and provides a clear opinion, meeting the basic task requirements, but the development of ideas is limited and repetitive. Coherence is hindered by weak paragraphing and repetitive, mechanical linking. Lexical resource is basic with frequent word-formation and collocation errors. Grammatical control is weak, marked by severe verb-form errors, subject-verb mismatches, and awkward phrasing that frequently obscures meaning.

Scoring criteria

Task Response 5.0

Strengths

  • The essay acknowledges both perspectives regarding durable versus cheap manufacturing.
  • A clear personal stance is stated in the introduction and reiterated in the conclusion.

Weaknesses

  • Arguments are overly simplistic, repetitive, and lack sufficient extension or detailed reasoning.
  • Supporting examples (such as Apple smartphones and generic cheap smartphones) are underdeveloped and assert claims rather than proving them.

The response addresses all parts of the task and maintains a position, but main ideas are inadequately developed with weak, generalized supporting examples, fitting the Band 5 descriptor for Task Response.

Coherence & Cohesion 4.5

Strengths

  • Basic paragraph structure is attempted with introductory and concluding remarks alongside body paragraphs.

Weaknesses

  • Paragraphing is unconventional, featuring isolated one-sentence paragraphs that disrupt overall progression.
  • Cohesive devices are used repetitively and mechanically (e.g., 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', 'Therefore').
  • Referencing is frequently unclear and local transitions are awkward.

Although basic paragraphing and transition markers are present, the overall progression lacks clear logic, and isolated single-sentence paragraphs lower coherence significantly, placing the response in Band 4.5.

Lexical Resource 4.5

Strengths

  • A basic working vocabulary relevant to manufacturing and commerce is used (e.g., 'enterprises', 'production companies', 'market').

Weaknesses

  • Frequent lexical repetition and unnatural word choices occur throughout the text (e.g., 'long-duration goods', 'buying ratio').
  • Word formation and collocation errors are widespread (e.g., 'competitior's companies', 'sales goods', 'good's prices').
  • The range of vocabulary is narrow and relies heavily on high-frequency, imprecise terms.

Inaccurate word choice, poor collocations, and frequent word-formation errors constrain the vocabulary and impede precision, corresponding to Band 4.5.

Grammar Range & Accuracy 4.0

Strengths

  • Attempted complex structures include subordinate clauses and conditional constructions.

Weaknesses

  • Severe grammatical errors pervade the essay, including fundamental verb pattern errors ('ought to be produced', 'will start to produce... while... will protect'), subject-verb agreement issues, and tense confusion.
  • Error-free sentences are rare, and complex structures are almost universally malformed.
  • Punctuation and article omissions occur frequently.

Widespread, severe grammatical errors across simple and complex sentences severely distort meaning and require frequent rereading, reflecting Band 4.0.

Writing stats

Words
290
Paragraphs
5
Grammar issues
10
Lexical suggestions
5
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